SMALL COUNTRY SIZE, COUNTRY CLUB FEEL
Seattle-based Boeing Company reported the sale Friday of three colossal custom jets of the new 777-77 Series. Spokesperson Breeze Whetlock says they will surpass the famous 747 fleet outfitted for the Saudi Royal family and the much-touted “Air Palace" once created for Playboy mogul Donald Trump. The buzz about the new planes centers on the addition of onboard golf and swimming.
Par Three Air-Golf with actual balls and real grass became a reality with the inclusion of two symmetrical holes on an hourglass-shaped green at the end of a banana-shaped fairway. Tailward, the pins are 200 yards left of the tee. Teeing off toward the nose, the flags are 180 yards to the right. The detachable belly of the plane allows the course to be watered, mowed and occasionally patched. Groundskeeper Julio Marquez thinks their course is the equal of any two par-3’s on the ground. “The in-flight turbulence is an equal handicap to all but the most veteran space traveler." Says Marquez: “Those astronauts-golfers really know how to use gravity."
As for swimming in flight? Imagine traveling with a full goldfish bowl on your lap in coach. “The Air-Pool is our finest achievement," says lead designer Larner Anthony Pique. “We have applied for 137 separate patents for lighting, entry and exit, in-flight stability, hygiene, swimmer safety and more. “A swimmer has to be able to get out and use the restroom even during a hard-banking turn," says Pique. “And we definitely had to keep water out of the cockpit. Conventional designs were out."
They chose baffles inside a large, clear Lexan sphere resembling an enormous hamster ball. “By gimbling the ball and using multiple entry airlocks we maintain the water level, have one or another air lock lined up at all times and let the baffles keep the waves from getting too tall."
Stewardess Venus Miller says that lifeguard duty was highly sought after on the trans-world test flights, but regrets that it was seniority based. “Some of us felt it should have been based on ability or at least on our looks," she said.
One of the new planes is earmarked for outgoing United CEO Brad Horsphal as part of his retirement package. The other two are headed for Dubai as wedding presents for oil-rich Sheik Sharif Mosalimy’s son and new daughter-in-law. Delivery of the aircraft is expected to be in early 2029.
E. Svehaug; Santa Cruz, CA 10/31/24